07 Jul 5 Divorce Threats and How to Handle Them
When a divorce happens, you can only hope for as smooth as a separation as possible. Perhaps more than anything else, threats from your soon to be former spouse can be stressful and frustrating. Threats surrounding custody of the children or valuable property can be emotionally confusing and put you in an awkward position. Thankfully, your attorney will be able to help you deal with these emotional threats in a way that is legal and helpful. Many possible threats could pop up, so it is important to be prepared for them. Here are 5 of the most common divorce threats people experience and how to handle them:
“I Will Make Sure the Judge Doesn’t Let You Have the Kids.”
Threats surrounding child custody are particularly disheartening, as they concern the people you love the most; your kids. However, many spouses who make these threats are simply communicating their insecurities about being able to gain custody themselves. Not allowing yourself to react in emotional extremes is important, as you will only fuel their threats. If you experience this type of threat, you should simply consult your attorney about your options. If a spouse is threatening to reveal “sensitive information” about you that will keep you from having custody, you should let your attorney know immediately. They will help you get the situation under control and help you develop strategies to combat these claims. Ultimately, very few things your spouse can disclose can affect the ability you have to raise your children.
“I Will Quit My Job to Avoid Paying Child Support.”
When the situation seems to be pointing toward your spouse being required to pay child support, things can get very heated. Threats of avoiding child support through drastic measures are unfortunately quite common. Thankfully, judges are very harsh on individuals who actively conspire to avoid these needed payments. Always attempt to have a witness that can testify in court about these sorts of threats from your spouse. Your attorney should be able to coach you on the best way to approach this testimony. Being properly prepared will help you avoid crippling financial situations that can occur from a lack of child support payments.
“I Will Delay this Case and Cost You a Fortune.”
Particularly vindictive spouses may hold a grudge during the separation and try and damage your financial stability. If you experience these sorts of threats, contact your attorney immediately. Delay tactics are very easy to combat if given the right preparation time, so make sure you block your spouse from dragging the case out. In the case that the spouse is actively succeeding in delaying the case, the judge may intervene and sanction the delaying spouse to pay your attorney fees. Documenting delay threats and having witnesses can always increase your chances of combating delay tactics successfully.
“Your Attorney isn’t Trustworthy. You Should Just Hire Mine.”
A spouse may try to bully you into hiring their attorney so they can have an advantage in the divorce trial. Ultimately, you will always be better served by hiring a separate attorney that you have personally interviewed, feel comfortable with, and that is entirely dedicated to your best interests. Hiring on the same attorney as your partner creates a conflict of interest and is frowned upon within the divorce court system. Never fall for the potentially disastrous trap of hiring on your spouse’s attorney, as they are likely motivated by vicious intentions. If your divorce is a particularly messy one, this situation becomes even more likely.
“This Divorce Will Go My Way. Period.”
Threats of this kind are most commonly made from spouses that were emotionally or physically abusive. Personality types that are obsessed with having control will often try and break you down mentally to have their desires fulfilled. In these scenarios, it is of utmost importance that you remember that they have little to no control over the outcome of the trial. That privilege is left to your attorneys, the law, and the court system. Your attorney should be able to give you a pep talk during these hard times and can also walk you through the legal implications of anything your spouse is bothering you about.
Never feel that you have to put up with these sorts of threats, as harassment is a serious offense. Consult your attorney if you feel that you are becoming the victim of continuous harassment from your soon to be former spouse. If threats become severe enough you may need to take further action.
Ultimately, it will be up to the court system to determine the details of your divorce in a trial, so never let yourself fall into the trap of thinking your spouse has all the control. Every threat they can make can be combated by consulting your attorney, as they have heard every threat imaginable many times before. Sit down with them today and start thinking through strategies you can implement if you become the victim of divorce-related threats.